Reflecting on love and marriage after 13 years “in the game”

I’ve been thinking a lot about what to write for this post. In a time where a lot of marriages don’t last and people give up on each other I’m really happy to say that my sweet husband and I are staying the course. Marriage takes commitment and sometimes work from both parties. Not all work, not all hard, but let’s just be real for a minute, sometimes it is work.

We’ve built quite a life together that I am very proud of. We have a strong, loving relationship and understand each other in ways no once else could (or would want to honestly). We have a pretty healthy relationship with our family on both sides and we have two beautiful children that push and challenge us almost every day (not literally, but if you have kids you know what I mean).

Tim is my lover, my partner, and my best friend. And I can honestly say that after 13 years of marriage I still love him and I love US. We are both better people because we have each other and GOD to guide us (even when we don’t always listen to him like we should).

Too heavy for a blog post, huh? I said I wanted to write this blog so people could get to know their photographer a little before they hired her. But maybe, just maybe, sometimes I write it for myself, to put it out there, you know?

I’m a wedding photographer (portraits and stuff too), but mainly I’m a wedding photographer because I BELEIVE in marriage and I BELEIVE in people making a commitment to each other and sticking it out. I read a tweet the other day that said, if the grass is greener on the other side, WATER YOUR OWN LAWN. It’s true. And that is one of the big underlying reasons I LOVE what I do. I photograph love and I photograph joy and growth with a couple and their family. And I do it with the utmost respect for the commitment of marriage between a man and woman who pledge before GOD to love each other for better or worse.

Quite simply, I love love. Real love. The kind that has kept both sets of my Grandparents together for over 50 years. It’s real. It exists. I’ve captured it in my camera. I live it everyday with my husband. I see it in his parents and I see it in mine. It’s not always pretty, but it’s real and that means something.

This year we decided to take a weekend away to celebrate our anniversary and I’m soooo glad we did. Reconnecting in the midst of working and raising kids as a couple is so important.

We headed to the ocean, because we both love the effect it has on us. I did my usually research and planning and found the Inn at Depot Hill, in Calistoga, California. Tim and I have been to quite a few bed and breakfast inns over the years and I have to say we both really, REALLY enjoyed this one.

Each of the rooms had a theme and ours was the Kyoto room. It was so tranquil and relaxing.

Santa Cruz Bed and Breakfast, the Inn at Depot Hill, Capitola, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

They even had a chilled bottle of wine waiting for us with a nice card.

Capitola Bed and Breakfast, the Inn at Depot Hill, Capitola, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

Tim did a little zen gardening while we were there…

Santa Cruz Bed and Breakfast, the Inn at Depot Hill, Capitola, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

After a little wine and appetizers at the Inn we headed down to the beach to enjoy the setting sun.

Santa Cruz Bed and Breakfast, the Inn at Depot Hill, Capitola, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

We both ADORE Capitola and the entire Santa Cruz Area.

Capitola Sunset, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

The next day we were treated to a delicious breakfast of Eggs Benedict. I didn’t throw my diet out the window, but I did enjoy this special splurge!

Capitola Bed and Breakfast, the Inn at Depot Hill, Capitola, California, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

After breakfast, we decided to head over to UCSC to check out the Arboretum since we had never gone. We spent more time in the gift shop searching for treasures than anything else, but the grounds were quite lovely.

UCSC Arboretum, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

My winter mountain man!

UCSC Arboretum, Teresa K photography, teresakphotography.com

We ended our weekend with a trip into Santa Cruz to a GREAT little tea shop Chaikhana-Tea Culture (which I HIGHLY recommend) and just enjoyed the afternoon together. It was nice to have some quiet time away from the craziness of life. I do love my husband. Here’s to the next year and all the wonderfullness and craziness it is sure to bring.

21 thoughts on “Reflecting on love and marriage after 13 years “in the game”

  1. Sounds like you had a nice little get away. Happy Anniversary! I hope there are many more years of those to come.

  2. Beautiful post Teresa. I couldn't agree more. Love is wonderful and sometimes relationships take some effort to get back on track but true love is definitely worth it.

  3. Cool. Just had my 12 year anniversary. Every wedding I photograph makes me remember my own. A definite perk.

  4. What a beautiful post. Congratulations on your anniversary – it is work!! I've been married 9 years myself. Love the images and now I'm hungry :).

  5. In a world that is not so dedicated to the values of marriage it is wonderful to see a couple truly staying the course. My wife and I subscribe to the same ideals, and while we are still a number of years behind the milestone you and your husband just reached, I am happy and confident in our ability to "stay the course" as well. Thank you for posting something like this. I feel like to many people disrespect the wonderful world of marriage, so it is nice to finally see someone standing up for how amazingly wonderful and rewarding it is if you work on it. P.S. I loved your "grass is greener" quote… I kinda re-re tweeted it. =)

  6. Wonderful post! My husband and I feel the same. So many enter into marriage lightly and are so quick to leave when life gets tough. we're married 13 years too! A lot of ups and downs but it's worth it!
    Congrats on your anniversary! Looks like you two had fun!

  7. Congratulations in finding your true love. Reading your story was touching, and I get a sense of true happiness. That's beautiful

  8. Tim & Teresa….Dad & I are both very thankful for the love & commitment you have shown for each other. Your understanding that the Lord brought you two together & that your vows were made to be lasting are a testament to the truth & value of them. The gift of your marriage is not only for you both & your children but, one that will give hope to others as they see you growing …working on (as all do in all the changing seasons of our lives together)but,a foundation of sowing God's love working in & thru us for our benefit & others. Our families have been blessed with couples understanding that marriage is a gift to be cherished ..worked thru when the trials of life & change come to us as they do for all. As well as to have someone that understands us deeply share the joys that come our way that doubles the enrichment of life. As you have said your grandparents have been married for over 50 years as well as Tim's grandparents were. Your parents for 38 years & Dad & I for 42 years this year. Marriage as we both know is worth the effort if both parties are willing to keep it alive & growing. Our families have been blessed with those that value marriage & families. Congratulations to you both for the willingness, commitment, & love to keep going in this world of walk away people! As you shared….If the grass seems greener on the other side…Water your own! We all need to keep renewing & refreshing each other….this too is a gift! We love you both….Dad & Mom K

  9. Congratulations on this special occasion! It's a great idea to document such a time with your photos – makes it more special for you! Thanks for sharing your story!

  10. I love your post! Congrats for being married 13 years! I am so in love with my husband as well after 9 years together and 5 married and I believe it makes me value my wedding photography that much more as well.

  11. What a wonderful post! Thank you so much for sharing "if the grass is greener on the other side, WATER YOUR OWN LAWN"- this is so true! if people put more effort into pleasing thier mate instead of complaining about them, there would be more happy marriages!

  12. Fantastic post and congratulations on your anniversary!

    PS: I'll keep an eye out for you at the next PPSV meeting, would be nice to finally meet you 🙂

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